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I know the tweet your referring to and that account is entirely satire.

Some quirks do. But they’re only on live series cards and cards that were flashbacks of players from this past year (think 2021 finest cards, 2021 post season cards, etc.). The main quirks that matter (for hitters) are first pitch hitter, dead red, breaking ball hitter, and unfazed. Those quirks add slightly to the hitters attributes depending on the pitch throw/count of the AB.